"We are all addicted to something that takes the pain away."
Addiction; a word no one wants to say, a topic no body wants to discuss, a problem that no person wants to admit they have. Addiction comes in every form possible and we all suffer from it, yet it is a taboo topic. When people think of the word addiction, they often think of the dirtier side of it like drugs, alcohol and sex but it can also come in more familiar ways like food, shopping or even beauty addictions. Though one may seem worse than the other, they all take high priority and they all require the attention and recovery that they deserve.
I have lost many loved ones from addiction, I know an even larger number that are still fighting the battle and a small few that are in successful recovery. I am not an MD but I can tell you from first hand experience that almost all addiction stems from trauma. It then rewires your brain completely, making it almost impossible to recover from or even realize that it has become your disease. It is referred to as a chronic disease(Diseases which have one or more of the following characteristics: they
are permanent, leave residual disability, are caused by non-reversible
pathological alteration, require special training of the patient for
rehabilitation, or may be expected to require a long period of
supervision, observation, or care) but it IS possible to recover from it, just as so with most other chronic disease.
I personally am addicted to food, I absolutely love it! My addiction started at a young age when my father would not let my sister or I leave the table until we were finished with the food on our plates....no matter how much was put on it or how full we were. We would find ourselves still sitting at the table at 9, 10 o'clock at night because we either hated the food or we literally could not eat any more. If it got to a certain time, we would be punished heavily. It got to a point where we would hide food under the cushions of the dining table chairs and behind the bookshelves, just so we wouldn't be beaten: as I got older, this grew into an obsession with finishing all of the food on my plate, no matter what. The addiction grew after my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer twice and then my parents divorce, when I would eat to comfort myself. It was never "too much" at this time, but the food always took the pain away and was always there for me at a time where I felt completely abandoned. Fast forward to young adulthood where I was binge eating for days at a time, eating out at almost every meal and crash dieting when I noticed any weight gain. I would always lose weight but then I would gain it back 10 fold.
We all have something that we are addicted to that takes away the pain, so wouldn't one think that if there is no more pain than there is no more addiction? I personally believe this to be completely true. There is no possible way to be pain free in life but it is possible to change the way we feel about the things that pained us in the past and the inevitable future pain we may go through. My recovery started with facing the fact that what I was doing was hurting and killing me. Many people are already at this point..."I know this triple bacon burger is bad for me but it tastes SO good. YOLO!" "I know this drug is tearing my family apart but I can't stop." "I know that we are going bankrupt but I have to have nice things." So what after that?? I looked into my past where I was reliving the bad times on a DAILY basis. It was extremely difficult for me to recall any good memories and at one point I figured that if I had forgiven certain people or events that I would be healed. Although forgiveness is a key factor in healing, it also has to come with a rewiring of the brain. When you focus on bad moments for so long, you are not only inviting more bad energy into your life but you are literally damaging the brain to where it knows nothing more than the darkness, no matter what light gets let in. To forgive something is to become ok with the fact that it happened, but to not let it hurt you anymore...you have to let it go(LET IT GO!)
I wrote a letter of the things I needed to let go, I burned it, and I cried.
Yes, it was that simple for me! In that very moment, I felt my shoulders get lighter, my heart become warmer and my thoughts started to finally clear up. It was almost instant that I started to recall a memory of laying in the back of my fathers GMC Suburban "big bird" with my sister, under the carport while it was pouring down rain because we all loved the sound and to watch it fall over the roof top. My heart got warmer and I could feel the actual "rewiring" happening. I retrained my brain to focus on the good things that did and would happen. I acknowledged the things that went wrong and knew that they had no effect on my here and now or future, if anything, they made me a beautiful and strong woman. Changing all of these things in turn, changed the way I felt about food, my addiction. I still LOVE food but I love the way it nourishes my body when I feed it the right things, gives me natural energy when I'm down and I mostly love the way it keeps me alive now instead of killing me! Instead of trying to heal pain through food or any other addiction, I was now just trying to experience more pleasure and make more wonderful memories. It may seem simple or even impossible, but it's real! Please take the time to heal your heart, reach out to someone if you need help and most importantly, don't forget to be alive!
Do you have an addiction you need to face or let go of? Have you successfully recovered from one? Please share your story in the comments to encourage others and reach out if you need a helping hand <3
Fermented foods are some of my favorite, mostly because I am of German decent. I grew up with sauerkraut as a side to everything. As I got older and my grandparents quickly passed, I found myself wanting more than just a CAN of kraut! (Enter Bulgarian Love of my Life) It almost seemed like my grandparents could hear my cries for something better and sent down my soulmate to fill that void I had been missing since I had lost them...from that point on, I was eating sour cabbage rolls and salad almost every week with my new family! On a beautiful Sunday morning exactly a year ago, my new little family and I did some exploring at their new farm house. We found some pretty amazing and interesting things that day.
After such a long day of exploring, we headed back home to make dinner. Baba was making fermented cabbage like she always did, in a large paint bucket! It always had my interest and amazed me. I'm sure she could tell, as she looked up at me and said "Come here, let me show you!" That day I learned the simple act of fermenting and I never looked back. It was a wonderful experience she shared with me; I had started to wonder if my family made it this way. I wondered if this is what it would have been like were my grandmother to show me some of her culture. I will never forget that day.
The Science⟾
When you combine fruits, vegetables and/or grains with salt water in an anaerobic state(no air/oxygen), a reaction happens between the good bacteria and the natural sugars found in these foods, creating lactic acid. This reaction lowers the anti-nutrient phytic acid(that stuff that makes you fart😷) that is found in grains and beans that inhibits the full absorption of nutrients into the gut. It also increases the activity of vitamins A, vitamin C and other macro- and micro-nutrients among various strains of probiotics. If you aren't familiar with probiotics, those are little miro-miracles that improve your digestion, help create a healthy gut and boost your immune system. It is also important to add prebiotics to your fermented foods as prebiotics are food for probiotics. When probiotics and prebiotics are combined, they form a synbiotic. Fermented foods can be amazing for keeping the common cold away, treating diarrhea and keeping good bacteria in your gut during antibiotics(just to name a few +'s).
The Act⟾
Fermenting is so simple. All you need is some local, seasonal, preferably organic veggie's, purified or filtered water and salt!! That's it. I started out using old pickle jars or whatever jar(cheeze whiz once hah) I had that was emptied as long as it wasn't metal and recently upgraded to Ball jars. You can literally use anything AND add anything to your liking, this is all YOU! Some of my favorite things to ferment are cabbage and radishes, yum.
The "Recipe"⟾
Sunday afternoon I came into some yummy, local carrots and knew I wanted to ferment them!! Have I ever fermented carrots before? No. Can I? YES!! I like to add garlic to my ferments because it is prebiotic so here is what I made. Again, you can add whatever prebiotics, herbs or flavors that you'd like to make it yours. NO SUGAR THOUGH :)
4 carrots sliced
1 1/2 teaspoons salt(table,sea salt or Himalayan)
sprig of fresh dill
2 garlic cloves
approx. 1/2 cup filtered water
1 cabbage leaf
Cut carrots about an inch shorter than the jar you're using; there needs to be room for the jar to "bubble" or it WILL overflow. Place sprig of dill in jar and fill it with carrots until almost tight. Squeeze halved garlic cloves in between slices. Sprinkle salt over the top of carrots and fill with water until the carrots are covered. Place top on and shake jar a couple of times until the salt is dissolved. Open the jar and place cabbage leave on top of the carrots to insure that they stay submerged and that no oxygen reaches them. Replace top tightly and find a nice spot on the counter for your new friend. In a couple of days you will see your friend start to come alive!! You will want to burp the jar(loosen the lid for a second) every couple of days to release the gas that is forming. It is best to leave the jar on the counter for at least 7 days but you can start tasting it after 5 to see if it's at a sour level that you like. The warmer the room is, the faster the fermentation happens so don't forget about your friend!
I would love to hear if you've ever tried to ferment at home and what kind of recipes you have. If you haven't, give it a try! I also have jars for purchase if you can't find time in your day to try it out on your own.
Happy Day,
Amanda
I personally am addicted to food, I absolutely love it! My addiction started at a young age when my father would not let my sister or I leave the table until we were finished with the food on our plates....no matter how much was put on it or how full we were. We would find ourselves still sitting at the table at 9, 10 o'clock at night because we either hated the food or we literally could not eat any more. If it got to a certain time, we would be punished heavily. It got to a point where we would hide food under the cushions of the dining table chairs and behind the bookshelves, just so we wouldn't be beaten: as I got older, this grew into an obsession with finishing all of the food on my plate, no matter what. The addiction grew after my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer twice and then my parents divorce, when I would eat to comfort myself. It was never "too much" at this time, but the food always took the pain away and was always there for me at a time where I felt completely abandoned. Fast forward to young adulthood where I was binge eating for days at a time, eating out at almost every meal and crash dieting when I noticed any weight gain. I would always lose weight but then I would gain it back 10 fold. 
I wrote a letter of the things I needed to let go, I burned it, and I cried.
